i realise i've been unable to let it go, i dno why it sparked off again when i was perfectly fine without thinking abt it for the previous month. somehow, it's back again and this time, the feeling's more determined than ever. actually it's nt a bad thing though, but somehow it's immoral, it's wrong, it's unacceptable but i'm falling for it. i know it myself it's negative and wun have any good outcome, i'm blinded by it. i'm able to think logically what's right and what's wrong but what i'm doing and wna do is the direct opposite. i wna scream to the world what i rly feel but i know i can't. hw torturing, juz end it, please, i dun care if it's good or bad, end this crap, end this suffering..

i found it suffocating to bring so much stuff to school today; it was a burden. the usual looking-forward-to-actvity mindset is nt there anymore and the uniform juz felt heavier and heavier with each step i take. it is no longer as light as a feather,in fact it's weighing me down. i seem to dislike some ppl mre after today. who are they to lecture me, to lecture us? forget it, i will juz get condemned for posting such stuff but heck la, i suddenly felt like graudating v quickly...haix.